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This summer movie season is turning out to be one of the worst I can remember. My birthday is this weekend and my choices for a b-day movie are Pirates 5, Baywatch or Alien whatever. I think I'll just stay in, order pizza and surrender my brain and frazzled nerves to Twin Peaks and remind myself that's it's Only four months until the fall and we get better movies like Blade Runner 2046 and Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi (which opens December 18th). As tradition, Vanity Fair showcases SW:TLJ with a magazine profile featuring interviews with the cast and makers, a look at returning and new characters and tidbits about the plot (hint: it takes place among the stars and apparently there's a war - don't sue me Disney.)

Vanity Fair just unveiled four new covers and the one above featuring a Obi-Wan-ish Luke Skywalker and Rey is my favorite. I don't know what they are looking at while standing on a rocky cliff on planet Auch-Tu, but it's probably not a rescue boat full of aliens - then again, it actually might be judging by some photos of filming. Wow. An alien rescue boat in the middle of the water. This movie is going to be f-ing weird.

The cast of Star Wars VIII welcomed famed photographer Annie Liebovitz on set to capture Mark Hamill and Daisy in Ireland (where Mark admits it took him an hour and a half to climb to the top of the mountain) and to also shoot Adam Driver as Kylo Ren, John Boyega as Finn, Oscar Isaac as Poe Dameron, Gewndoline Christie as Captain Phasma and Carrie Fisher as General Leia. Liebovitz also photographs Anthony Daniels as C-3PO - while holding the droid's head under his hand (dude, weird.)

But possibly the most striking photo is one captured by Annie of Mark and Carrie in a tender bonding hug so I guess we can safely assume that an on-screen reunion between Luke and Leia occurs in Last Jedi, which will be the first time we've seen these characters share a moment since 1983's Return of the Jedi. Maybe these two met up and decided to take in a night of gambling at the alien casino we will see in this movie. Wait! An alien casino. Holy cow, man - like I said, weird.

 

   

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Jennifer Lawrence's MOTHER! Poster Is Interesting

Analysis Of The 2016 Box Office So Far

Margot Robbie's Vanity Fair Profile Was Pretty Skeevy

Here Is The Official STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS Poster

Published in Film & Movie

Happy mother's day! Darren Aronofsky (Black Swan) unveiled the teaser poster for his upcoming horror/chiller/drama/whatever-the-f-ck film Mother! which opens two weeks before Halloween. Here you can see Jennifer Lawrence holding her own ripped out bleeding heart in her hands yet her expression seems more like she's handing out free samples of pizza rolls at Costco. No really, this is the exact expression Costco sample servers display on their faces. THIS right here. Now whenever I walk by a sample of Costco's red velvet mini-cakes I'm going to think of Jennifer Lawrence holding her gross, slimy heart in her hands. Thanks, Hollywood. 

Published in Film & Movie Tagged under

Published in Film & Movie
Thursday, 28 July 2016 18:16

Analysis Of The 2016 Box Office

Twenty years ago this month, Independence Day (or ID4 as it came to be known) was well on it's way to becoming the biggest movie of the summer. By the following January, it went on to become the highest grossing movie of the year and Hollywood's first billion dollar blockbuster. This month, the sequel, Independence Day: Resurgence is not drawing nearly the same number of audience members. Could it have anything to do with the fact that while an original idea at the time, it doesn't play so well with audiences today? You could argue that point although the very first Mission: Impossible movie opened a month and a half before ID4 in early summer '96 and last year, the fifth Mission movie still killed at the box office. One could argue that ID4 actually never even needed a sequel. Since the summer of '96 we've had War of the Worlds and several other aliens invading Earth movies (bet'cha forgot all about 2000's What Planet Are You From? That's okay. Most people do.) Plus, there is the terrible fact that 9/11 possibly changed attitudes about audiences not exactly jumping up and down in anticipation to see U.S. landmarks crumbled by laser blasts from the skies anymore. At least in those Avengers movies, they all threw themselves into buildings which then turn to bits of rubble, but then the govt. made the Avengers clean everything up afterwards. Try getting an alien creature to do that. Nope. Not happening.

Published in Film & Movie Tagged under Trailers Movies  Box-office  Margot Robbie

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James Horner (1953-2015)
Published in Film & Movie
Thursday, 30 July 2015 20:30

James Horner (1953-2015)

Oscar-winning Titanic composer James Horner, died Monday morning in a small plane crash near Ventucopa, CA, in Santa Barbara County. Horner, 61, was identified Monday evening as the pilot of a single-engine S-312 Tucano MK-1, a plane registered in his name. According to CBS 2 in Los Angeles, the plane wreckage caused a brush fire, which Santa Barbara County Fire responded to at approximately 9:30 AM PST.

Published in Celebrity Gossip

During a workout session, model Nina Agdel must have really been in quite the zone, as she exercised so hard she busted a hole right in the back of her tight dark yoga pants. Apparently, Nina was unaware of the round rip so she pranced around the gym for 20 minutes with her ass-crack exposed. At least she didn't rip the front instead. Once it was pointed out to her that she was giving everyone a free show, instead of fleeing into the change room to put on another pair, or even finish her work out for the day, she decided to snap a selfie and share it to the world on Instagram. I notice that Nina is not wearing any underwear hear and that is quite unsanitary. I seriously don't know how Nina can ever expect to land a man when she's exhibiting gross bad habits such as this. It's truly very sad. Well, the guy on the ground there doesn't seem to mind though. Perhaps they should go on a date or something. Believe me, she's done worse. Way worse.

Image Courtesy Instagram/NinaAgdel © 2015

 

Published in Celebrity Gossip

Well she certainly has the right hair color for it. Demi Lovato has been tapped to provide the voice of Smurfette in an upcoming Smurfs movie. Joining her will be Rainn Wilson as the voice of Gargamel and Mandy Patinkin as Papa Smurf. No word on who will voice Azreal the cat but I'm sure right now, Taylor Swift is going to volunteer her kitty Meredith Grey for the job. 

From Entertainment Weekly: The new film will follow Smurfette and her brothers as they search for a legendary Smurfs village, and the movie promises to answer longtime questions — like why are there 99 boys and only one girl? Demi Lovato will star as Smurfette, Mandy Patinkin will voice Papa Smurf, and Rainn Wilson will play the Smurfs’ nemesis Gargamel.

Unlike the two previous Smurf movies, this one will be mostly computer animated in the vein of Tintin and this fall's upcoming Peanuts movie. There will be none to very little live-action scenes. Sounds like a good idea because those previous Smurf movies were horrible. Hey, you know what those movies could have used? A really hot girl bouncing up and down on an exercise ball.

But that pretty much always goes without saying.

Image Courtesy Getty

Published in Celebrity Gossip

Suck it, Avengers! Jurassic World (which I'm calling Jurassic Park 4 because that's really what it is) which opened on midnight, this past Friday has already earned an estimated $557 million dollars worldwide setting an all-time record for a film opening in June. Then again, the average movie ticket price these days does cost around $15-16 dollars so I'm certain that factors into it. Hey, here's a tip of mine on what do you do when you're on a movie date with a girl and you pay over $30 for tickets but then can't afford snacks: you do what the cheap-O's do and you stop at the drugstore on the way to the theater and buy a couple of $0.80 chocolate bars and also smuggle in a couple cans of Pepsi inside the pocket of your leather jacket. Wait, is that wrong? Yeah, you're right. That is wrong. I meant smuggle in a few cans of Diet Pepsi. Yeah. There we go.

Published in Film & Movie

Feast your gaze upon this, ladies. It's the official poster for this summer's Magic Mike XXL opening in July. Right now I'll bet your mouths are wide open as you stare at Joe Mangeniello's chest - which if you look close (like I need to tell any of you to do that) you can almost make out a smiley face. Or is it a grumpy face? I don't know but can we just agree that it looks like some kind of face? And what is that hand gesture he's making? Is he going "No. No need to ask. My right hand is scratching inside my ass-crack. It's itchy back there." The dude behind him is just pointing at a drone probably. The shaggy haired guy to the far right of him thinks he's Bono the way his arms are in the air like that - and in front of him is Matt Bomer, all chiseled and handsome with perfect hair and teeth and dreamy blue eyes. Pfft. Big deal. When he stands back up his jeans are going to be stained from that dirty floor he's kneeling on and then he'll look like a big slob. Ha-Ha.

And that brings us to Channing Tatum front and center. Nice backwards ball cap, Marky Mark. Is that the Funky Bunch behind you? And dude, where the hell did your left foot go? And how are you even able to stand with your one foot on your tiptoes like that? That must be why you have the same expression on your face as I did when I sprained my ankle while out for a walk one night last summer.

Magic Mike XXL opens July 1st where you can then see all these ripped, fit, bare-chested, muscular hunks who take very good care of their bodies through exercise and strict diets, in HD on a large theater screen. You know what? For supper I ate two bacon barbecue cheeseburgers and a big bowl of fudge-chunk ice cream. I should probably go for a jog or something. Right after my nap. My eight hour nap. Wake me up for breakfast where the menu is greasy sausages and cold pizza! Yum! 

Image Courtesy Warner Bros Pictures.

Published in Film & Movie
Wednesday, 22 July 2015 17:12

Fraulien Rosario Dawson Strips

Sexy Rosario Dawson strips for the new November issue of GQ Germany.

Published in Film & Movie